Stream of Consciousness

I'm in a pipe club with the dirtiest old men I've ever encountered. "Salud y Pesetas, veintecinco mujeres y cincuenta tetas". Cheese, wine, tabacco, cradle robbing and, well, more wine. I'm not usually a big fan of wine but dude brings in some stuff I actually enjoy. Also I think I am gonna stock gouda in my fridge. It seems like a reasonably versatile form of curdled milk, it could go with crackers, or tabacco, or double stuff oreos. Speaking of which I recently, while preparing a legitamite dinner, ate milk and cookies and actually /ruined my appetite/. I have no regrets! Well I have plenty of regrets but none of them are related to cookies, with the notable exception letting a girlfriend think I enjoyed her cookies when in fact I didn't. I damned myself to much deceptive cookie-motivated excitement. Fortunately I am a skilled actor and a wonderfully talented bullshitter. I will marry the first girl to make me a good lemon merangue pie, even the first girl to explain to me how to spell merangue. The quickest way to a man's heart is chuck norris' fists. Someone was once told that I am "more well read than I look". How the hell is that to be taken, I settled for my looking extraordinarily well read and in reality being more than extraordinarily well read. Speaking of reading, Luke 2:16 says the Sheperds came with haste to view the baby Jesus. Does anyone else picture "haste" as some sort of dish that they brought? "Hi, we're the sheperds and brought some haste." Then do you picture them feeling down because one of the Magi brought Gold?. Which is better? Making something for the Baby Jesus or just grabbing some gold from your vault? I would make haste for the Baby Jesus, or at least his parent's, assuming they aren't busy with that whole "Virgin" hold no longer over their heads. Do you suppose Joseph ever said "thats my boy!" when JC was playing cricket, or whatever Jewish boys in Jerausalem played? Didn't the colonials believe themselves to be British? What would you think if some dude drove down the street screaming "The Texans are coming!" You'd think football team, eh? Or maybe those Republic of Texas nuts, thats why I own guns, to shoot Texans.