Excerpt

I Love this Guy:

"Ting-Tong," He chuckled, "I've heard many things."
"Yeah? Like what?"
"Ahh, just things, go on in."
Tog turned and hesitantly opened the chamber door. This was a new one to him. If Art-Deco and a Victorian Designer had a love child that child would shit this room. The intricate patterns spewed everywhere were an outright offense to the eyes. He got in and was instantly dizzy.
"Why can't any of these rooms be decorated tastefully?" He muttered to himself.
"Exit To The Right" even though there was only 1 door. Tog opened it and stepped out to the Durazno collection.
"Who the fuck are you? Do you fuckers need to send someone different every god damned time? Ah well, welcome to Durazno." It was said through a cigarette being lit. Ting-Tong was wearing old black jeans an a black tank top. From what Tog could see the man liked his tattoos. He wore a meticulously cultivated five o'clock shadow and no hair otherwise. The man looked like a rebel gone to pasture. Tog was surprised by his lack of sycophany.
"Ting-Tong I presume?"
"Say the name and god-damned if you don't get the man. You smoke fucker? I got these sticks from a guy I know in Eurasia. Fucking delicious. I'd give up mediocre pussy at least once a day for a pack of these." He offered Tog a cigarette, who declined with a wave. "Your loss man, offer stands."
"Thanks" Tog was warming to this guy.
"So you're here about a our shitbrick. Business as usual dude, the eggheads tell me I got fucking 55% to offer this time 'round. Ain't no bad shakes," he paused to remove the bouncing cigarette from his lips and exhale a puff of smoke that actually did smell pretty delicious, "You oughta pay out your fucking nose for that, but whatever keeps us running, y'know what I mean?"
He didn't. "I'll need to scan it.."
"Hell yeah, fuckers like me lie like a cheap rug. Mi casa and all that, fap where you want just clean up after. Follow me to the shitbrick." He left out a door and Tog followed him down a small path to the ruck. "Scan away dude, when you're done I gots some ladies coming in, y'know. They do this thing with a basket and spinning, if it don't make you bust your dick's broke. I could call up a couple more, probably get a discou..."
"Thanks, but no" Tog interrupted with a chuckle, "busy day."
"'nother day 'nother dollar, fuck if I don't know it man. If you get some off time you let me know and I'll get you every disease south america has to offer" He lit another cigarette.
Tog took a moment to scan the ruck. 52 percent, Ting-Tong's eggheads were right. Tog figured he would send some slag Ting-Tong's way, he liked him and this was a very decent load.
"Looks good doesn't it? Goddammnit I love this job," He spread is arms as if to embrace the giant block of ruck, "People send me their shit and I sell it. Fucking, I ain't a reading man, but there's got to be some sort of profound irony there or some shit."
"It looks good, yeah. You want some slag?"
"Fuck yes I want some slag. These cigarettes'll only go so far, am I right? Toss whatever shit you can my way and I'll find some use for it." He grinned and slowly brought his cigarette toward his mouth.
"Great, I'll get you something."
"Fuckin' A, pleasure doing business man, now leave or stay but I plan on getting down to business doing pleasure." He laughed deeply.
"Have your man send it to Kansas, we're full-up in Persia."
"No shit? You weren't fucking kidding busy day. And just so you know my tech is a broad, huge tits and the prudence of a turnstile. Say the word and I'll hook your ass up, she likes power, catch me?"
"One day, Ting-Tong" Tog really liked him.
..end meetting ting-tong. I fucking /love/ ting-tong